The Gottman Method is a structured, research-based approach to couples therapy developed by psychologists John and Julie Gottman. It begins with a detailed assessment of your relationship and uses the results to guide treatment. Sessions are available in person and online.
What is the Gottman Method?
The Gottman Method grew out of more than four decades of research on how couples interact, including long-term studies that followed couples over time. That research identified patterns that distinguish stable, satisfying relationships from those that struggle, and the therapy is built around those findings.
Rather than relying on talk alone, the method pairs a clear assessment with specific, practiced skills. Couples come away understanding what is working, what is not, and what to do differently.
Couples do not need to be in crisis to benefit. Many seek help to strengthen a relationship that is already stable.
When Couples Seek Support
Recurring Conflict
The same arguments keep returning without resolution.
Emotional Distance
You feel disconnected, or more like roommates than partners.
Major Transitions
A new baby, a move, a career change, or caring for a parent is straining the relationship.
Rebuilding Trust
You want to repair trust after a breach, including infidelity.
Building a Foundation
You are engaged or newly married and want to begin with a strong footing.
Seeking Clarity
You are unsure whether to stay together and want to decide with more information.
How Our Approach Works
Assessment
Treatment begins with a joint session, followed by an individual session with each partner and a feedback session. Together these give your therapist a clear picture of your history, your strengths, and the areas that need attention. We use standardized questionnaires to support this work.
Understanding patterns
Your therapist helps you recognize the interaction patterns that tend to erode connection, including what the Gottmans call the "Four Horsemen": criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Understanding how these patterns show up between you is the first step toward changing them.
Building skills
Each pattern has a counterpart that can replace it. In session, you practice approaches such as gentle start-ups to difficult conversations, repair attempts during conflict, and ways to calm yourselves when emotions run high. Between sessions, you apply what you have practiced in daily life.
Strengthening the relationship
Beyond reducing conflict, therapy focuses on friendship, shared meaning, and everyday connection. Couples learn to build Love Maps, a detailed knowledge of each other's inner world, and to show appreciation in ways that last.
Core Components of the Method
The Sound Relationship House
A framework describing the elements of a lasting relationship: friendship, trust, commitment, conflict management, and shared meaning.
The Gottman Relationship Checkup
An online questionnaire that evaluates your relationship's strengths and challenges, used to set treatment goals.
Conflict Management Skills
Practical, rehearsed techniques for starting hard conversations gently and for repairing during or after disagreement.
How this fits within Psychology Partners Group
Relationship strain often overlaps with individual concerns such as anxiety, depression, burnout, or trauma. Because we are a multi-specialty group, your couples therapist can, with your consent, coordinate with a colleague who is working with one of you individually. This keeps each person's treatment and the couple's work consistent with one another.
Our couples clinicians are approved members of the Gottman Referral Network and the Gottman Relationship Checkup program.
